The monologues keeping running in my head.
My anxiety plays out,
pulling me into the deepest of thoughts.
All the things I should have said,
all the things I will say!
Yeah right.
The words will stay smooth and concise,
locked away neatly,
with every other monologue that has played out
in the recesses of my brain,
yearning for
what was never received.
Justice.
Words that may seep out onto paper,
fragmented;
attempting imagery of
a voice lost,
feelings betrayed,
boundaries nonexistent,
and a fear of being real with myself.
But the closure I am certain they would bring;
hurling from my tongue onto the ears of those who have hurt me so deeply,
the lesson that will so clearly be there for them to see,
will not be found so easily.
So, the monologues keep running in my head.
And I;
slowly,
with focused and deliberate intention,
work on changing that internal conversation.
Sometimes the lesson to learn, is that it is not my lesson to teach.
Let go, move on.
~~~~~
Thank you for reading, if you enjoyed this post don’t forget to click like, and then follow my blog.
Please stop by and check out the essential oils that I use for coping and the books that I reference for clarity and understanding as I learn to live with PTSD.
Do you have a hobby? I make homemade cards as part of my self care routine.
If music plays a big role in coping for you, like it does for me, try this 30-day free trial
Products are linked to purchase for your convenience; and your support through my affiliate links (at no additional costs to you) help me maintain this blog and continue sharing my journey to heal.
Love & Support 💜💚