Thoughts Over Coffee
Coffee is therapy. Read along as I relate and offer affirmation to the struggles of living with Complex PTSD over my morning coffee.
It feels kind of like when the numbing agent begins to wear off from the dentist.
As my weekend of trauma anniversaries gets smaller in the rearview mirror, I feel myself slowly reconnecting from a state of disconnect I hadn’t realized I slipped into.
Sometimes it is hard to reconcile how disconnected I can actually become, when I feel like I have made so much progress to this point in my healing.
I start to feel exasperated, questioning if this will go on like this forever. Does it ever stop?
However, these moments are so important to my healing. In these moments I need my own love the most. My inner child needs this space. It is space I was deprived of as a child, so I bottled up all of my pain and all of my feelings.
My journey is so personal to my story. My ebbs and flows make sense only to the grief that I am feeling and processing. Accepting that is allowing my inner child the space and love she desperately needs to heal.
Your journey is personal to your own story. Allow your process to flow without judgement so that you can give yourself the proper space you need to heal.
You are doing exactly what you need to do, even on the days you do nothing at all.
Closing Comments
Thank you for reading, if you enjoyed this post. For more content visit my Site Archives.
Be a part of the Survivors Speak Interview Series which is dedicated to amplifying the voices of Survivors of childhood trauma by providing a platform to share truth through our stories. If you would like to participate in this interview series and share your story submit your informationVisit my Agency Resource page for hotline information if you or a friend needs help.
A great reminder, “No two survivors survive the same. And so, no two survivors will heal the same.” Thank you!
As a man, I came into healing with a mechanical approach, but this is CSA I’m dealing with, and just started my journey to heal 38 years after I realize this isn’t anything like fixing an engine. There are all kinds of complexities to this, deep rooted emotions and perspectives that surface, and that sometimes feel overwhelming.
It’s sometimes hard to see a survivor who’s so far into their journey, hosting a wealth of retrospect, wisdom, and so empowered. At the same time it is also encouraging to witness and really hear them because it means I’m on the right path. The overwhelming piece of that is the realization that I have so far to go, and sometimes that can make me feel down.
You bring forward another good reminder, the peaks and valleys are real and should be honored. My survivor fitness is much more than it has ever been, and try to make a habit lately to acknowledge where I’m at on this path, and make space to honor the wins and struggles.
Thanks for “Thoughts over Coffee”
– Scott