Consistently Inconsistent

Thoughts Over Coffee

Coffee is therapy. Read along as I relate and offer affirmation to the struggles of living with Complex PTSD over my morning coffee.

I spent a few hours the other day in a focused work flow in front of my computer. It was a nice change from the driftless feeling I have had lately.

I sat and went through my website, I created some content and I even played around in my graphic design program. It was nice, I felt accomplished when I was done – properly fatigued from the work I had just put in.

Last night I even slept better than I have most of the week.

While I was updating my website I also took some time to read through some of my oldest writing; pieces I wrote when I first began therapy in 2017. This meme comes from one of those pieces.

Since day one, the only consistency with my trauma healing has been it’s total lack of consistency. Good days, bad days, in-between days. Days when I feel nothing, days when I feel everything.

There is no such thing as healing and moving past my childhood – healing childhood abuse means remembering, integrating, and living fully in spite of it all. It’s a lot of work. Reading back four years ago however, I see my progress and that is priceless.

Please remember, a little bit each day will add up to a lot!! Keep going, you are doing such a a great job!!

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3 thoughts on “Consistently Inconsistent

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  1. “Reading back four years ago however, I see my progress and that is priceless”

    That is amazing! :). Really gratifying for you, and great that you are able to visibly see the progress in that way.

    I also think back to how my mind state was ‘this time a year ago’ quite often, and it’s definitely true that little bits add up to a lot. 💙

    1. I promised myself in May of this year after I lost my job that I would put as much effort into my trauma work for 1 year as I have into making other people rich my whole life.

      I am so glad I made that decision. For the crap this year has thrown at me – I’ve probably done the biggest personal switch up in my life. ☺

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