A time of year considered festive and happy.
Unless you are a childhood trauma and abuse survivor. Then the holidays become stressful, anxiety ridden, even scary. Many of us riddled with memories of horrible childhood holidays, or anxious because we have to be part of a fairy tale family get together.
So many emotions, and all of them in one space. For some this is an exciting time of year, for others it is a glaring reminder of a childhood of abuse and terror.
For me it is both. I am so excited this morning for my young daughter to wake up so we can tear into the gifts under the tree. I feel safe and content in my home with my husband. But my mind cannot help but allow memories to flow freely.
Interesting how the symbolism of a “holiday” can exacerbate everything already tormenting us inside as we stress about boundaries, dysfunctional family dynamics, seeing people, talking about things, memories – even money.
My message to all of you warriors out there this Christmas day … put yourself first. Full stop. Nothing more, nothing less.
Reclaim this day, rebuild for yourself the safety and the trust you need to celebrate fully. Surround yourself with the people who matter, even that is only yourself and your pets. You deserve peace and calm as you heal and process your past. You are not required to “celebrate Christmas”.
It is okay to say No. It is okay to leave early. It is okay to express boundaries. It is okay to put yourself and your emotional and mental needs first! Wishing you a beautiful day today my dear friends. I am honored to be on this healing journey with you and I am so proud of all of us showing up every day.
We are healing together!
Below is a LIVE show I did with my friend and fellow trauma survivor. In this discussion she and I got candid about our childhood holidays and how they affect how we celebrate now as adults. We talk triggers, boundaries, and reclaiming the holiday as our own, making is safe to be celebrated fully.
Wishing you peace and happiness friends.