Thoughts Over Coffee via @survivingchildhoodtrauma
Recently I have felt so light and present. Better than I have felt in weeks, probably months. I feel focused, and I feel like I have a handle on my upcoming work; I feel prepared.
Of course when I am on a high, it always brings with it a reflection of the ebbs and flows of healing and the hard work that goes into moving through the harder parts. It’s a reminder that trauma healing is a lifetime commitment.
I have said in my therapy sessions before that it isn’t the actual abuse that is hard to accept. In fact, for me, that is the easy part. I know who my abusers are and what they did.
It’s the healing part that throws me off every once in a while.
Acceptance of the Journey
On the hardest days, I find it challenging to accept the effects of my childhood abuse; the anxiety, the triggers, the intrusive thoughts, the physical and emotional flashbacks, the negative internal dialogue, the false beliefs systems, and the doubt in myself that can flare.
It is so much.
There are so many empowering moments, but damn, there are some seriously heavy moments too (which I am good at minimizing because I want to succeed). But my emotions during these times are just as valid as the moments when I am unhindered and progressing with ease.
This is why it’s important to have a “coping tool kit”.
The roller coaster of emotions and accepting this journey for what it is doesn’t always feel good in my body or sound good in my head, but the only way to ease my discomfort is to heal it.
There is no going back now.
Through, Not Around
Healing is the only way and in the hardest moments of healing all I can do is learn to cope, self-soothe, and to lean into my wounds so that I can move through it.
I don’t always like this option and that’s okay.
On goes the journey
Survivor’s Circle Peer Support Groups meet on alternating Wednesdays and Fridays via Zoom. Attend a session and experience the magical healing that happens when survivors connect and support each other through shit only we can understand.
Join me for a five-week semi self-paced journey through healing. Loaded with information, resources, healing practices, somatic exercises, and journaling prompts all supported by me via (3) individual 1:1s with you.
I will help you create a safe space, build skills for coping with emotional overwhelm, gain a better understanding of how to manage your triggers, identify and communicate boundaries, and reassess your self-care plan to ensure it is sustainable.
I can’t heal you, but I will do everything I can to make it a little bit easier for you while you heal yourself.