The Survivors Speak Interview series is dedicated to amplifying the voices of survivors by providing a platform to share our stories and connect us through experiences and healing. Read stories of childhood trauma as survivors share their pain, their hope, and their healing.
Caitlin’s Story
Pennsylvania, USA
Please share what inspired you to share your story.
I want to tell my story so other people know that they are not alone.
Introduce yourself: tell us about your passions, interests, family life, favorite quotes, etc.
I love reading, writing and doing diamond art. I have an amazing, supportive husband who has helped me heal from my childhood trauma and is teaching me how to play the guitar.
Please share your story in as much or as little detail as you are comfortable.
My father emotionally and verbally abused me for several years. He blamed me for everything growing up.
When I texted him a few years ago, saying how much what he did hurt me he denied everything. Saying “what are you talking about?” , acting like I’m the crazy one. He laid on top of me when I was younger and forced eye drops in my eyes. I didn’t realize until a few years ago that this was physical abuse.
To this day, I still can not put eye drops or contacts in my eyes. I tried having a relationship with him but he only cares about himself. I saw him once this year at a family dinner. Before that, I hadn’t seen him in a year. I limit my contact with him. I don’t have a relationship with him at all.
What are some of the challenging ways your trauma has manifested in your life?
I’m afraid to put eye drops or contacts in my eyes. I feel guilty about everything including canceling plans with a friend. I’m super sensitive. If someone asks me too many questions, I get overwhelmed and cry. When I first met my husband, it was very hard to open up to him. He had to tear down the walls that I made in order for me to communicate to him.
When did healing begin? Was there a catalyst moment and how did you reach this point?
Healing for me began last year. I finally realized that I needed to do what was best for me and heal from the trauma that my dad caused.
What has your healing journey looked like day-to-day: techniques, modalities, practices, tools you use?
I write letters to my inner child, I dance in the shower. I’m starting to connect with myself.
What are two or three things you have learned as you heal that you believe are important for survivors to know as they heal?
I have learned that I can do little things for myself as I heal such as write, dance and sing.
Everything that happened in my childhood was not my fault. I don’t need my father for anything. I’m thriving without him.
I have a great husband, great friends and a job I love. Going no contact with a narcissistic parent is essential for healing.
Additional Thoughts from Caitlin
It’s good to take life one day at a time. Listening to music and crying your heart out is very therapeutic.
Thank you for sharing your story brave warrior!
Share Your Story
Sharing your story is a powerful part of your healing journey. It helps you find and reclaim your voice and it helps others who are trying to find there’s. It lets us all know that we are not alone when we can connect through shared lived experiences. Use the link below to submit your story in writing.
If you would like to share your own story with the Surviving Childhood Trauma community, please use the link below to submit it.
Looking for Ways to Connect With Other Survivors and/or Receive Support as You Heal?
Survivor’s Circle Peer Support Groups might be just what you need.Â
These small groups meet on alternating days of the week via Zoom. In these groups, survivors connect, share, and support each other through the ebbs and flows of healing. Attend a session and experience the magical healing that happens when survivors connect and support each other through shit only we can understand.
Hi, I am Shanon
I am a trauma informed, trained, and Certified Peer Support Specialist in the state of Wisconsin. I am also a survivor with years committed to my own trauma healing after being diagnosed with (C) PTSD due to childhood abuse. Additionally, I have a professional and personal history of community facilitation and peer work.
I specialize in helping survivors like you make connections between real time experiences and past trauma wounds, identify and communicate boundaries, create self-care plans that work, navigate big emotions and trauma responses, reparent your inner child, and embody your own self-worth through the healing process with confidence and personal empowerment.
These support groups and 1:1 peer support sessions should not replace professional therapy; they will however provide additional support and information.
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